Photograph of Bismack "BigDumbo" Biyombo during his Friday night antics
Numerous sources have reported seeing Boston Celtics center Bismack "BigDumbo" Biyombo carousing through the streets of downtown Boston, talking about how he kept seeing pink people everywhere he went. JaVale "JaFail" McGee was also with him for at least part of the evening. The duo were apparently hunting for a mouse named Timothy, even though Bessie the Soda Collector, who lives under one of the city bridges, told them that Timothy was visiting his cousin Ralph to check out Ralph's new motorcycle.
The two Cs big men are notorious for their boneheaded plays on the court, and it showed off the court as well, as they sang terribly and loudly through the streets in their quest. One onlooker groused that they sounded "like a pair of damn crows", and told them to keep moving or he would make them regret it. Sources say that in response, Biyombo picked up a nearby lizard and started swinging it in the air, singing a tune.
Still of the lizard incident, with lyrics from Biyombo's "Lizard Song"
Biyombo was later seen by himself, gorging on a giant bag of peanuts purchased at a 7-11. When asked about the incident, a Celtics employee allegedly said, "We don't talk about the elephant in the room."
2028
